It has only happened around family thus far, but I have no doubt Gavin is going to say it at church or in front of the home teachers... "Daddy said the F-Word."
And, it's true. I did.
Not too long ago, in an effort to improve the language in our house, Rochelle and I told the kids they could no longer say the words Butt or Fart. (I warned you there would be graphic language.)
Occassionally, I slip and say, "Fart." In my defense, Gavin is a little fart and sometimes that's the most accurate way to describe him. Inevitably, when I do, Gavin gasps indignantly and declares, "Daddy said the F-Word." I can only recommend you not say the F-Word around Gavin in public.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
14th Anniversary
This week, Rochelle and I celebrated our 14th anniversary. Here are some of the highlights. (Warning this posting is appropriate for all ages, no salacious details included.)
Last week my mom made us shamrock cookies with green frosting. We served those at our wedding luncheon; and my mom makes them for us every year about this time. She's a keeper, too.
Sportsman's Warehouse in Pocatello is closing -- dang economy! So, Rochelle and I went in to check it out last weekend (about 18 million other people had the same idea). I found a chuck box for camp cooking that I was pretty sure I couldn't live without. Rochelle bought it for me as an anniversary present.
We normally celebrate our anniversary by going out and spending money on a short vacation, or at least a really nice night out. But, the pressure was on me to get Rochelle a nice gift since she got me something so awesome. Sadly, I don't think I did as well for her. I ordered her some scented wax for her Scentsy-Nice-Smelling-Wax-Melty-Things (that's the official name, I'm pretty sure). I also got her an array of beautiful smelling lotions and bath products and a bunch of red roses. I even spent some time in Hallmark choosing a card (couldn't get the image of Kevin James's stand-up routine on card buying out of my head while I did it, though).
Feeling like I was coming up short, I booked a really nice room in Idaho Falls, and made the arrangements for my mom to stay with our kids so we could get away for Friday and Saturday. We drove race cars at the go-cart speedway, dined at Johnny Carino's, caught Race to Witch Mountain at the Edwards (I anticipate seeing a Witch Mountain ride the next time we go to Disneyland, and yes, it will be awesome), went to the Titanic exhibit at the museum, played 2 rounds of disc golf, bought the Twilight movie, and had lunch at the new Red Robin in Idaho Falls. It was a blast.
I highly recommend the go-cart raceway if you have 30-60 minutes to spare. It was really fun to drift around the corners.
Oh, and our room had a private hot tub in the loft. Had to mention that to make Rochelle blush. Probably won't work.
I'm already feeling the pressure for next year when we hit 15. If we can afford it, we're going to try to go to Hawaii. If not, there's always Bingo in Fort Hall.
Last week my mom made us shamrock cookies with green frosting. We served those at our wedding luncheon; and my mom makes them for us every year about this time. She's a keeper, too.
Sportsman's Warehouse in Pocatello is closing -- dang economy! So, Rochelle and I went in to check it out last weekend (about 18 million other people had the same idea). I found a chuck box for camp cooking that I was pretty sure I couldn't live without. Rochelle bought it for me as an anniversary present.
We normally celebrate our anniversary by going out and spending money on a short vacation, or at least a really nice night out. But, the pressure was on me to get Rochelle a nice gift since she got me something so awesome. Sadly, I don't think I did as well for her. I ordered her some scented wax for her Scentsy-Nice-Smelling-Wax-Melty-Things (that's the official name, I'm pretty sure). I also got her an array of beautiful smelling lotions and bath products and a bunch of red roses. I even spent some time in Hallmark choosing a card (couldn't get the image of Kevin James's stand-up routine on card buying out of my head while I did it, though).
Feeling like I was coming up short, I booked a really nice room in Idaho Falls, and made the arrangements for my mom to stay with our kids so we could get away for Friday and Saturday. We drove race cars at the go-cart speedway, dined at Johnny Carino's, caught Race to Witch Mountain at the Edwards (I anticipate seeing a Witch Mountain ride the next time we go to Disneyland, and yes, it will be awesome), went to the Titanic exhibit at the museum, played 2 rounds of disc golf, bought the Twilight movie, and had lunch at the new Red Robin in Idaho Falls. It was a blast.
I highly recommend the go-cart raceway if you have 30-60 minutes to spare. It was really fun to drift around the corners.
Oh, and our room had a private hot tub in the loft. Had to mention that to make Rochelle blush. Probably won't work.
I'm already feeling the pressure for next year when we hit 15. If we can afford it, we're going to try to go to Hawaii. If not, there's always Bingo in Fort Hall.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Fodder for My Kids' Future Psychiatrists
Last time I posted under this heading, I told stories about my two boys and promised stories about my girls in the future. Here are a couple:
Gabby has been losing teeth lately, which I hear is normal for a girl of 5-6 years, but I like to tease her that she has lost teeth from kissing too many boys. One of the first times I teased her about it last fall, she told me she had only kissed one. Not even a month into kindergarten she had a boyfried. I am really looking forward to her teenage years...
We had a nice conversation with her about not really kissing the boys at school, and it seemed to have worked. Then, within the past week or two, I found out that she had been kissed at school again. Only, this time, she had given something nice to a little girl who had learning disabilities. The girl showed her appreciation by trying to kiss Gabby on the mouth. Yep, sure enough, Gabby lost another tooth.
It's hard to think of good, embarrassing stories to tell on Naomi because she's really a good kid. But, we had plenty of drama on our Disneyland trip -- see my posting to read about all of the vomiting fun -- the worst of the hurls were Naomi's. I mentioned in that posting about not being able to tease a 10 year old girl into riding the Tower of Terror after she decided it was too scary. That happened on our first night in the park. A really hard rain had soaked us all in the late afternoon, so we had returned to the hotel for dinner. Our little kids, my mother and Rochelle wanted to call it a day, but the older kids wanted to go back to the park for some adventure. I was certainly game.
We talked about doing all of the most thrilling rides: California Screamin', Space Mountain, The Tower of Terror, etc. Both Naomi and Benjamin were psyched for a thrill-seeking evening. We started with the Tower of Terror. It was easily the most exciting ride we had taken (Benjamin didn't even open his eyes -- didn't know there were windows at the top). Naomi was about 10 shades whiter in the face as we walked away. I asked if she wanted to go on the roller coaster (California Screamin'). No way. How about Space Mountain? No. After asking if she wanted to go on several other rides (each getting tamer than the one before), she finally agreed to "Talk to Crush." If you haven't been to that one, I'll explain the level of adventure. You sit in a small theater and Crush the Turtle from Finding Nemo swims onto the big screen and interacts with the audience. As you enter, the attendant invites the children to sit on two lilly pads (green splotches on the carpet near the screen) so they can see better. Benjamin went up, but Naomi sat clutching my arm until at least halfway through the show. Good thing Crush was there to lift her spirits; she had refused the Carousel before agreeing to Crush.
Gabby has been losing teeth lately, which I hear is normal for a girl of 5-6 years, but I like to tease her that she has lost teeth from kissing too many boys. One of the first times I teased her about it last fall, she told me she had only kissed one. Not even a month into kindergarten she had a boyfried. I am really looking forward to her teenage years...
We had a nice conversation with her about not really kissing the boys at school, and it seemed to have worked. Then, within the past week or two, I found out that she had been kissed at school again. Only, this time, she had given something nice to a little girl who had learning disabilities. The girl showed her appreciation by trying to kiss Gabby on the mouth. Yep, sure enough, Gabby lost another tooth.
It's hard to think of good, embarrassing stories to tell on Naomi because she's really a good kid. But, we had plenty of drama on our Disneyland trip -- see my posting to read about all of the vomiting fun -- the worst of the hurls were Naomi's. I mentioned in that posting about not being able to tease a 10 year old girl into riding the Tower of Terror after she decided it was too scary. That happened on our first night in the park. A really hard rain had soaked us all in the late afternoon, so we had returned to the hotel for dinner. Our little kids, my mother and Rochelle wanted to call it a day, but the older kids wanted to go back to the park for some adventure. I was certainly game.
We talked about doing all of the most thrilling rides: California Screamin', Space Mountain, The Tower of Terror, etc. Both Naomi and Benjamin were psyched for a thrill-seeking evening. We started with the Tower of Terror. It was easily the most exciting ride we had taken (Benjamin didn't even open his eyes -- didn't know there were windows at the top). Naomi was about 10 shades whiter in the face as we walked away. I asked if she wanted to go on the roller coaster (California Screamin'). No way. How about Space Mountain? No. After asking if she wanted to go on several other rides (each getting tamer than the one before), she finally agreed to "Talk to Crush." If you haven't been to that one, I'll explain the level of adventure. You sit in a small theater and Crush the Turtle from Finding Nemo swims onto the big screen and interacts with the audience. As you enter, the attendant invites the children to sit on two lilly pads (green splotches on the carpet near the screen) so they can see better. Benjamin went up, but Naomi sat clutching my arm until at least halfway through the show. Good thing Crush was there to lift her spirits; she had refused the Carousel before agreeing to Crush.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Things I Learned at Disneyland
We pulled into our driveway at 1:30 a.m. last night (2-17-09), after spending a wild six day trip to/from L.A. to visit Disneyland and the beach. Yes, the kids and I all swam in the ocean (got wet hair and everything) on Sunday when it was 55 degrees.
Here are some of the things I learned on our vacation:
In-N-Out burgers look and smell much better going in than coming out.
If a child throws up as you are leaving the last southbound exit to Las Vegas, the next exit with a gas station (public bathroom) is approximately 30 miles down the road.
That 30 miles is the worst part of the whole trip.
When that is the 6th time a child has blown chunks on the trip, it has gotten pretty old by then.
When a hotel puts two double beds in a bedroom approximately 3 feet apart, they are just asking for kids to jump back and forth.
Kids really enjoy pushing all of the buttons on an elevator, but become violently angry when another child pushes a button when it was not that child's turn.
Certain unsupervised children (thankfully not mine) see no need to use a towel when going from the outdoor pool to their room (using the elevator).
If the hotel puts an empty pitcher in a hotel suite, some adult guests will insist they are entitled to fill the pitcher with milk from the dispenser at the breakfast buffet, even when the polite staff tell them that is not allowed... "Do you want me to take the milk up to my room one glass at a time?!" The man demanded. (Thankfully not part of our group).
If you have the option, bring a family member with a handicap hanger for your car -- improves your parking options drastically.
Waiting an hour to have your picture taken with two fairies is way too long, unless you are a ten year old girl.
It never gets old to make the following kinds of comments while waiting in line for your child to get a photo with Winnie the Pooh and Tigger:
"I've never waited so long to take a picture of poo."
"Watch out, kid, you just touched poo."
They don't allow beggars or "unofficial" street performers to play for money in Disneyland... which is nice. But, they have countless vendors selling products designed to be irresistable to all small children every ten feet. Okay, I bought some crap for me, too.
After three days, a $4 water doesn't seem like such a bad deal.
None of the rides actually make money fall from your pockets -- they're much more subtle about separating you from your money.
The following people really annoyed me:
1. The group of four wide-bodies that had to walk abreast and go about half as fast as everybody else.
2. The people who stopped in the middle of a traffic flow for no aparent reason.
3. The guy who farted as he left the area waiting to get on the Tower of Terror, which lingered in the waiting area for us to enjoy.
4. The official photographers who insist on taking pictures of your family and then explain to you how you can purchase those photos.
5. The upper-middle aged woman and her family directly in front of us who had to sit down every two feet as we progressed through the 75 minute waiting line at Space Mountain.
6. Line crowders .
7. The teenagers who had to make-out while in line directly in front of my kids.
8. The grouchy worker who insisted my three year old put his shoes on immediately before leaving the fairy place. Sheesh, after waiting an hour in line, the kid had to entertain himself -- was counting toes that offensive?
9. The people walking against the flow of traffic.
10. The guy who decided body odor was an effective tool to get ahead in line, or at least get extra space around him.
Kids like scary rides much more after the ride is over. The moment before the ride starts, they are not so sure they still want to ride.
If you tease a 12 year old boy about riding the Tower of Terror with his eyes closed and head between his knees (he didn't even know there were windows at the top) he will ride it again and even hold his hands in the air to prove how brave he is -- ah, peer pressure at Disneyland.
Once a 10 year old girl decides she did not like the Tower of Terror -- that it was too scary -- don't even bother teasing her about it, her mind is made up and she won't get on the thing again.
The same 10 & 12 year olds who threw up 6 combined times on the ride to California can ride all of the scary rides without hurling once. I consider that a Disney Miracle.
Once kids, mothers, and grandmothers get thoroughly soaked from the rain, they really only want to go back to the hotel and get warm and dry. They're funny that way.
Moms don't want to go on Splash Mountain in the rain -- don't ask.
Once a 76 year old grandmother rides the Matterhorn, she's pretty-much done riding roller coasters, unless you count the Winnie the Pooh ride -- which turned out to be her favorite.
All of the girls who work at Disnelyand are really nice to you, but that doesn't mean they're "coming on to you" -- still, it's fun to tease a 12 year old boy that they are interested in him.
It was really fun to make an off-hand comment loud enough to be overheard that the the teenage girls who just sat in front of us on the Tower of Terror might want to wear their raincoat hoods in case Benjamin threw up again. (They were brave and didn't actually pull their hoods up.)
Valentines Day evening at Disneyland is not terribly romantic for you and your sweetheart if your 12 year old son comes along and rides with his mom on all of the rides. But it was still really fun.
3 year old boys love to spin as fast as you can on the teacup ride -- even if they can't sit up because you are spinning so fast.
When a semi truck crashes and is burning in the roadway ahead of you blocking traffic for over an hour, some people will let their kids out of the car to go check it out.
Nick and Laurel will gladly attend a Samoan Sacrament Meeting if you give them the address to the closest church (even if you wait to attend the later, English-speaking meeting).
If you can go to the park with more family, do. Then, you can ride the exciting rides with your brother-in-law while your wives and kids get soaked at the kiddie rides. It's okay if you don't feel too guilty about it, but its better if you act sorry at the time.
It was an awesome vacation -- we all loved it and had a fun time. I'm sure Rochelle will write about it too.
Here are some of the things I learned on our vacation:
In-N-Out burgers look and smell much better going in than coming out.
If a child throws up as you are leaving the last southbound exit to Las Vegas, the next exit with a gas station (public bathroom) is approximately 30 miles down the road.
That 30 miles is the worst part of the whole trip.
When that is the 6th time a child has blown chunks on the trip, it has gotten pretty old by then.
When a hotel puts two double beds in a bedroom approximately 3 feet apart, they are just asking for kids to jump back and forth.
Kids really enjoy pushing all of the buttons on an elevator, but become violently angry when another child pushes a button when it was not that child's turn.
Certain unsupervised children (thankfully not mine) see no need to use a towel when going from the outdoor pool to their room (using the elevator).
If the hotel puts an empty pitcher in a hotel suite, some adult guests will insist they are entitled to fill the pitcher with milk from the dispenser at the breakfast buffet, even when the polite staff tell them that is not allowed... "Do you want me to take the milk up to my room one glass at a time?!" The man demanded. (Thankfully not part of our group).
If you have the option, bring a family member with a handicap hanger for your car -- improves your parking options drastically.
Waiting an hour to have your picture taken with two fairies is way too long, unless you are a ten year old girl.
It never gets old to make the following kinds of comments while waiting in line for your child to get a photo with Winnie the Pooh and Tigger:
"I've never waited so long to take a picture of poo."
"Watch out, kid, you just touched poo."
They don't allow beggars or "unofficial" street performers to play for money in Disneyland... which is nice. But, they have countless vendors selling products designed to be irresistable to all small children every ten feet. Okay, I bought some crap for me, too.
After three days, a $4 water doesn't seem like such a bad deal.
None of the rides actually make money fall from your pockets -- they're much more subtle about separating you from your money.
The following people really annoyed me:
1. The group of four wide-bodies that had to walk abreast and go about half as fast as everybody else.
2. The people who stopped in the middle of a traffic flow for no aparent reason.
3. The guy who farted as he left the area waiting to get on the Tower of Terror, which lingered in the waiting area for us to enjoy.
4. The official photographers who insist on taking pictures of your family and then explain to you how you can purchase those photos.
5. The upper-middle aged woman and her family directly in front of us who had to sit down every two feet as we progressed through the 75 minute waiting line at Space Mountain.
6. Line crowders .
7. The teenagers who had to make-out while in line directly in front of my kids.
8. The grouchy worker who insisted my three year old put his shoes on immediately before leaving the fairy place. Sheesh, after waiting an hour in line, the kid had to entertain himself -- was counting toes that offensive?
9. The people walking against the flow of traffic.
10. The guy who decided body odor was an effective tool to get ahead in line, or at least get extra space around him.
Kids like scary rides much more after the ride is over. The moment before the ride starts, they are not so sure they still want to ride.
If you tease a 12 year old boy about riding the Tower of Terror with his eyes closed and head between his knees (he didn't even know there were windows at the top) he will ride it again and even hold his hands in the air to prove how brave he is -- ah, peer pressure at Disneyland.
Once a 10 year old girl decides she did not like the Tower of Terror -- that it was too scary -- don't even bother teasing her about it, her mind is made up and she won't get on the thing again.
The same 10 & 12 year olds who threw up 6 combined times on the ride to California can ride all of the scary rides without hurling once. I consider that a Disney Miracle.
Once kids, mothers, and grandmothers get thoroughly soaked from the rain, they really only want to go back to the hotel and get warm and dry. They're funny that way.
Moms don't want to go on Splash Mountain in the rain -- don't ask.
Once a 76 year old grandmother rides the Matterhorn, she's pretty-much done riding roller coasters, unless you count the Winnie the Pooh ride -- which turned out to be her favorite.
All of the girls who work at Disnelyand are really nice to you, but that doesn't mean they're "coming on to you" -- still, it's fun to tease a 12 year old boy that they are interested in him.
It was really fun to make an off-hand comment loud enough to be overheard that the the teenage girls who just sat in front of us on the Tower of Terror might want to wear their raincoat hoods in case Benjamin threw up again. (They were brave and didn't actually pull their hoods up.)
Valentines Day evening at Disneyland is not terribly romantic for you and your sweetheart if your 12 year old son comes along and rides with his mom on all of the rides. But it was still really fun.
3 year old boys love to spin as fast as you can on the teacup ride -- even if they can't sit up because you are spinning so fast.
When a semi truck crashes and is burning in the roadway ahead of you blocking traffic for over an hour, some people will let their kids out of the car to go check it out.
Nick and Laurel will gladly attend a Samoan Sacrament Meeting if you give them the address to the closest church (even if you wait to attend the later, English-speaking meeting).
If you can go to the park with more family, do. Then, you can ride the exciting rides with your brother-in-law while your wives and kids get soaked at the kiddie rides. It's okay if you don't feel too guilty about it, but its better if you act sorry at the time.
It was an awesome vacation -- we all loved it and had a fun time. I'm sure Rochelle will write about it too.
Friday, February 6, 2009
Gavin's First Prayer
For quite a while we've encouraged Gavin to pray with the rest of the kids at night. He shot us down every time until last night. He was a little way from the rest of us, but he kneeled down and was clearly saying a "personal prayer." After his amen, he was very proud of himself and we were proud of him too. After we told him what a good thing he had done, he told us proudly, "I said a prayer. I prayed to Elmo."
Well, at least he's praying.
Well, at least he's praying.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Fodder for My Kids' Future Psychiatrists
Apparently the purpose of blogs is to tell stories about your children and not worry about the future counseling bills such disclosures will have on said little tykes. To wit:
For a period of time this past fall, Gavin immediately brought a stop to all singing (without regard to singer, genre or quality of performance) with one exception. I was allowed to sing the Heat Miser/Snow Miser song from the Year Without a Santa Claus. All I can say is the kid has taste. Or at least had taste. Since Rochelle began her blog, we've spent some time on Playlist.com, which has exposed our children to a broad array of music (meaning lots of hair bands from the 80's). I recently caught Gavin singing, "Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock. He also enjoys rocking out to "Jump Around" by House of Pain and "Walk This Way" (The Run DMC/Aerosmith version). I blame Rochelle, totally.
Benjamin might freak out for me telling on him, but I'm going to do it anyway -- maybe he'll be a little less sappy if he worries about stories like these getting out:
Benjamin likes a certain girl at church (and school), who for the sake of anonymity shall be referred to as "Bertha." This year our church schedule has mutual on Wednesday nights. Benjamin has gone to judo practice on Monday and Wednesday evenings for the past 2.5 years. (Don't worry, we do FHE on Sundays because we want to keep our salvation intact.) So, this week I asked Benjamin if he wanted to go to scouts or judo on Wednesdays (like he really gets a choice -- I serve in Young Men's). He told me without hesitation that he wanted to go to scouts. I asked if he would still want to go to scouts if they were working on merit badges. He said yes. I asked, "What if you're working on the really boring merit badges... like citizenship in the community or personal finance?" He said he still wanted to go to scouts. I asked why, and he smiled real big and said, "Because Bertha will be there in opening exercises."
Another quick one on Benjamin: We were having cornbread with dinner recently. After applying a generous amount of honey, Benjamin said, "This honey is almost as sweet as Bertha." He then sighed dramatically.
What a sap!
Stories about our girls shall be forthcoming.
For a period of time this past fall, Gavin immediately brought a stop to all singing (without regard to singer, genre or quality of performance) with one exception. I was allowed to sing the Heat Miser/Snow Miser song from the Year Without a Santa Claus. All I can say is the kid has taste. Or at least had taste. Since Rochelle began her blog, we've spent some time on Playlist.com, which has exposed our children to a broad array of music (meaning lots of hair bands from the 80's). I recently caught Gavin singing, "Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock. He also enjoys rocking out to "Jump Around" by House of Pain and "Walk This Way" (The Run DMC/Aerosmith version). I blame Rochelle, totally.
Benjamin might freak out for me telling on him, but I'm going to do it anyway -- maybe he'll be a little less sappy if he worries about stories like these getting out:
Benjamin likes a certain girl at church (and school), who for the sake of anonymity shall be referred to as "Bertha." This year our church schedule has mutual on Wednesday nights. Benjamin has gone to judo practice on Monday and Wednesday evenings for the past 2.5 years. (Don't worry, we do FHE on Sundays because we want to keep our salvation intact.) So, this week I asked Benjamin if he wanted to go to scouts or judo on Wednesdays (like he really gets a choice -- I serve in Young Men's). He told me without hesitation that he wanted to go to scouts. I asked if he would still want to go to scouts if they were working on merit badges. He said yes. I asked, "What if you're working on the really boring merit badges... like citizenship in the community or personal finance?" He said he still wanted to go to scouts. I asked why, and he smiled real big and said, "Because Bertha will be there in opening exercises."
Another quick one on Benjamin: We were having cornbread with dinner recently. After applying a generous amount of honey, Benjamin said, "This honey is almost as sweet as Bertha." He then sighed dramatically.
What a sap!
Stories about our girls shall be forthcoming.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
5 Reasons Why Reading this Blog Might Just Be the Smartest Thing You Did Today
1. This blog contains zero grams of saturated fat, no MSG and hardly any anabolic steroids.
2. When your mom asks if you would read this blog if Jesus knew you were reading it, you can answer, "Yes" with a clear conscience... at least until I post my playlist.
3. 4 out of 5 dentist recommend chewing Trident sugar free gum while reading this blog -- bet you didn't know that. Now you do.
4. This blog is not associated with any illegal ponzi investment or pyramid schemes.
5. This blog holds all of the mysteries of the universe, and for five dollars I'll give them all to you. Please pass this message along to two of your closest friends.
2. When your mom asks if you would read this blog if Jesus knew you were reading it, you can answer, "Yes" with a clear conscience... at least until I post my playlist.
3. 4 out of 5 dentist recommend chewing Trident sugar free gum while reading this blog -- bet you didn't know that. Now you do.
4. This blog is not associated with any illegal ponzi investment or pyramid schemes.
5. This blog holds all of the mysteries of the universe, and for five dollars I'll give them all to you. Please pass this message along to two of your closest friends.
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